Friday, June 1, 2012

Kobold Ramsey Meets Balfur The Blessed Bandageer - A Punventure.

Last night I had the great joy to get to take part in a little playtest of #dndnext with some good friends. @Steamboat28 took charge of DM duties and did nothing short of his usual to ensure an amazingly fun time. What follows is a pseudo log/transcript of the experience that I think will speak enough for it's self without me having to butcher the attempted recapture of what was nothing less than magnificent fun.

@Steamboat28: So, you saunter into an inn, on a cold, dark night.
 @Irvanovitch: Bar fight.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: Hmmm before I even look back at this sheet... can we name 'em? I wanna be Balfur the Blessed Bandageer
@Steamboat28: LOL.
  Done.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: Yay!
 @Irvanovitch: Let's go you frothing neckbeard
 @Steamboat28: So, Balfur and company enter an inn, searching for ale.
  and wenches. gotta have wenches.
  but, the place is deserted
  it's dark.
  in fact, it's pitch black.
  (you're likely to be eaten by a grue)
 @Irvanovitch: Casting light
 @Steamboat28: the place is illuminated.
there's no one there.
  except, (roll a wis check)
Meatshield: 18
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: insight 16...
 @Steamboat28: ok.
 @Irvanovitch: 17
 @Steamboat28: everyone hears singing in the back room.
lots...of singing.
  what do you do?
(Meatshield says he's heading for the back room)
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: "Healin', healin' get yer healin right here... we got a special on burned bottoms!" I will follow Meatshield
 @Steamboat28: (and since he's the meatshield, you're all safe for now)
@Irvanovitch: following behind the meatshield, with a spell ready to throw
 @Steamboat28: Meatshield opens the door,
  and you all see, dressed in chef's hats and frilly pink lacy aprons,
  5 KOBOLDS.
  BAKING A CAKE.
Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: So, can we take an action, are they surprised or what? cause I'd love to activate searing light
@Steamboat28: Initiative time!
 Meatshield: 15
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: I got a 14
 @Irvanovitch: ....Um...er...
 3
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: so, it's cleaver reaver first
 @Steamboat28: yes.
 you'll notice one thing, though--
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: ginsu ho!
 @Steamboat28: one of the kobolds is dressed like Gordon Ramsey.
  he's decorating the cake.
 @Irvanovitch: * facepalm *
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: are you smoking kobold crack?
 @Steamboat28: Meatshield drew his crossbow upon entering (i forgot to type it),
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: I will light his candle...
 @Steamboat28: and he's gonna shoot Gordon Kobold in the leg.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: do eet
where is an orchestra when you need one... kill da kobold
 @Irvanovitch: Is the cake shaped like Stephan?
 @Steamboat28: LOL. YES.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: the cake has permanent disadvantage vs kobolds
 @Steamboat28: He shoots the crossbow, and it tears through Gordon's leg (23 atk)
 @Irvanovitch: ((LOL))
 @Steamboat28: (snerk)
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: so are we down one iron kobold?
 @Steamboat28: He is hurting, and the other kobolds throw over tables for cover.
 @Irvanovitch: (question: what is this building made of?)
 @Steamboat28: (stone foundations, wooden structure)
  (the kitchen is mostly stone, due to the hearth fires)
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: searing light on kobold ramsey, 21 atk
 @Steamboat28: the light blinds Gordon, as it strikes him in the face!
  (does it deal damage?)
  (i forget, and i'm too lazy to look it up)
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: 19 dmg
 @Steamboat28: ...his head asplode.
  ruining his cake.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: radiant and the description speaks of it as a ray of the sun so... yeah
 @Steamboat28: oh wow.
  His head turns into a momentary halo of brilliance before it asplodes.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: "Can I intrest anyone in todays special?"
  go mirv go
 @Steamboat28: The other four kobolds are peeking out from behind their tables, two on each side of the room
PM @Irvanovitch: I'm stepping up beside the meatshield, and casting Burning Hands, targeting the two on the left.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: oh, do we have any oil perchance, in the adv kit? I forget
@Steamboat28: Dex saving throws: 16, 18. The table bursts into flames, and one kobold ducks, quickly
  (10 dmg, 5 dmg)
  He isn't quick enough; both burn to a crisp.
 You hear Draconic.
  The smell of rotting meat comes from a crate in the corner.
 It bursts open,
  the rotting meat inside spilling out,
  writhing with the Draconic chanting,
 into a massive Minotaur. [*Credit goes out to WotC own Chris Perkins for the idea]
 @Irvanovitch: blink
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: what?1? "I don't bandage livestock!"
 @Steamboat28: A great undead Minotaur, reconstituted from beef,
  growls into your faces.
  This ain't no soy, children. Your turns.
 Meatshield attacks the Minotaur with his greataxe, swinging at Chuck Roast, Jr.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: "Rancid beef be gone" I'm getting my holy symbol out...
 @Steamboat28: He cleaves the "beefcake,"deeply scoring the searmarks. (17 dmg)
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: I will move to face the vile venison and cast turn undead
 @Steamboat28: The mystery meat flinches from Pelor's might!
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: "Get the to a grazery in the sky!"
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer:  what you got ray? I mean mirv
 @Steamboat28:Turn is different, I hope they beef it up later. har har
Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: oh we'll pun-pulverize this beefcake
 @Steamboat28: LOL
  We're so "cheesey."
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: we could be dead and horny like him
 @Irvanovitch: moving so that I can avoid burning my meatshield's ass, and torching the other two kobolds
  (ye gods, I cast magic missile at my brain to make the puns stop)
@Steamboat28: (so...at the darkness? ;) )
  CAST IT
 @Irvanovitch: (...well played, sir)
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: I don't think it can effect programming
 @Irvanovitch: 10 dmg again
 @Steamboat28: You sear the kobolds, but not the hamburger barbarian.
  They burn, along with their scroll, to a crisp.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: "Kobold-a-la-mage anyone?"
 @Irvanovitch: "I like mine....extra crispy"
 @Steamboat28: lol
  The (now literal) meatshield takes a swing at the only foe left.
 It slices into the rotten flesh, taking another wound (15 hp)
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: shield us from mad cow disease most valiant meatshield
 still standing I take it?
 @Steamboat28: Oh yes
  Oh very yes.
  But, the spell was incomplete (and this battle is taking longer than some of our players have), so it didn't start at full health.
  Balfur, it's your turn.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: alright well then I'll radiant lance him 20 atk
 @Steamboat28: Your shining spear strikes at the heart of this foul creature!
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: 12 dmg
 @Steamboat28: The abomination writhes in agony, as Pelor's cleansing fire eats away at part of his flesh.
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: oh magic mirv...
 @Irvanovitch: Magic mirv uses magic missile!
  It's not very effective (3 dmg)
 @Steamboat28: "Ow. Horseflies."
 Balfur The Blessed Bandageer: holy hamburger...
 @Steamboat28: The beast smashes at Meatshield, (attack 12)
  missing him.
 Meatshield swings back, striking the creature,
  tenderizing him back into a pile of dead meat.
 Congratulations--you've survived your first #dndnext encounter
equipment vs on the sheet

After this little playtest of the #dndnext material I have to say I am still really happy with the way things are handled thus far. I did find turn undead to be a little surprisingly underwhelming. But for someone who hasn't ever played a cleric, much less actually played in ages(I have been on the other side of the screen for years) I loved it. Spell casting was so satisfying and made me feel like more than just 'the healer.' Wasn't the one running it(thanks again @Steamboat28) but as a player it was very easy to handle everything. Only had to reference a couple of things during play and not a single chart or table was required.

My verdict overall is two-fold: 1.) Must playtest more. 2.) Need more material to consume.