Originally I hadn't intended to share this in this way. However, after it was read at the funeral for my Grandfather it has occurred to me that I owed it to him to share it with those who weren't able to attend. As such, I offer it here in this format for anyone so interested:
The Wealth of Wisdom Not Found in Words.
If you will kindly bear with me, I’ve never been very
skilled at speaking – I’m used to being the one writing the words instead of the
one speaking them.
Fred Howard is my Grandfather. Over the course of his life he
has worn many different hats; he has been a carpenter, a soldier, a father, a
husband and a friend. But at the very core of his being he is best described –
in my mind – as a noble man. To those who knew him, I think you can agree with
me that he would never ask for such praise or speak as highly of himself. My
Grandfather was a man of humility, of honor and honesty.
There is a phrase he once told me as a child that I have
never forgotten. In so many ways, you could say it was the closest thing to his
personal motto and trademark as anything ever could be. What he said was this;
“If a job is worth doing, then it is worth doing right the first time.” It was
more than just how he approached every task, be it crafting a cabinet to
building a box or even designing a dresser. It is how he lived his life. It is
evident in how he lived every day. So I can say with absolute certainty that he
can hold his head high, because as I look back I have no doubt that he did the
job right as we all should endeavor to.
Growing up I spent a lot of time with my grandparents. I
relished any chance to see something he was working on, to ride with him on any
errand and to learn anything he could tell me about. For years I longed for the
day when I would be big enough to learn everything he knew about working with
wood and how to build things.
Sadly, health and circumstances prevented anything of the
sort from ever being possible. However, thanks to my Grandfather’s influence
there were other more valuable lessons that he imparted to me. He did so
without ever having to truly lecture or make speeches. He did so by being an
example of discipline, dedication and decency. Thanks to my Grandfather I saw a
consistent image of what a man should always strive to be. He was humble, honest
and honorable; all the things that make good men great.
I know that in his passing many will lament his absence;
they will remember him fondly and talk warmly of him. But what we should all
take the time to realize is that he will never truly be gone. He lives on in
each of us, whether we realize it or not. Every time my little brother lifts a
hammer to nail two boards together; it is with my Grandfather’s example behind
him. When my Mother cares for someone who needs a hand she shows the same
compassion and preservation of dignity that her Father has shown her. Anytime I
encourage my own children to uphold their word and responsibilities I am
passing on the same wisdom my Grandfather provided me.
My Grandfather wasn’t the most educated of men; he wasn’t
rich or famous in most uses of the word. What he was, was a decent, honest and
hard working man. He took care of his church, and led the singing there – not
because he wanted to stand in the limelight or feel special – but because it
was a job that needed doing and he could. To my knowledge, he never has been
awarded any honors or acclaim. Even if he had been I doubt he would have ever
made a fuss about the matter or wanted anyone else to. But if any man ever deserved
to have their life honored and remembered it is my Grandfather. His legacy is a
living one; of being an example others should strive to emulate.
In parting I would like to end with the words I wrote as a
dedication from a story that was in part inspired by my memories of my
Grandfather;
Dedicated to my beloved Grandfather; a more honest,
honorable and simply strong character of a man I have never known. May we all
be blessed to have such a handy hammer in our lives to help build us into a
better man or woman.
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