Monday, July 11, 2011

The Blossom of Void.

For the record, somehow things have managed to form themselves out of the ethereal vapor that is life into a chaotic barrage of random insanity. Not far off my normal routine I have come to expect from reality and what it enjoys gifting me with. I've never truly grasped any hidden meaning, pattern or even a cause to explain these moments as they occur, but only learned to accept that it is a byproduct of my given fate(at least that is one theory).

Wrestled my youngest daughter down to bed last night in our routine adversarial nocturnal combat in hopes of helping return some semblance of a decent rest schedule to her. And, true to form she fought fiercely to resist my efforts. Just as I would expect of any worthy antagonistic nemesis. As such it was midnight by the time I could declare victory and relocate her to her own territory for slumber. Immediately I sought a quick snack and then, with great difficulty mind you, decided to give up on a movie and retire to slumber my self. A wise tactical decision, since withing only 2-3 hours she awoke to seek me out to renew our bed-time battle.

Unfortunately for me, her own stubborn-nature and fiery temper fueled by drowsiness lead her to continue her struggle all the way into post-dawn hours. Eventually by sometime between 7-8, as best I can figure, she finally proved defeated once more and I was able to return her to her bed again. Not without having to endure screaming, kicking/bucking, numerous throws of her na-na(her pacifier), and even several batteries of punches. By that point I returned to my chair and proceeded to collapse until my wife roused me a couple hours later.

The weather outside is unbearably humid and hot to the point of being painful to even look outside. Numerous task await me to complete them, demanding my attention. And while I have managed to see to some of them I keep finding myself lacking the energy/drive to tackle everything that catches my eye. It feels like I am setting in some kind of void that has blossomed around me.

I recently picked up a 1 Tb portable external hard drive and have been backing up all the data of importance to me from my net-book etc., with the idea of re-loading my little net-book with a fresh install. Now that I think I might have everything backed-up I find myself reluctant to do just that. Which is weird, one of my favorite things used to be diving in and setting up machines from scratch and getting everything 'just-so.' I even keep trying to play some WoW, or pretty much anything, only to find I can't seem to muster any real interest.

Desperately I want to passionately dive into something and enjoy it. To tackle various projects. And yet this void has blossomed again. Alas, hopefully it will pass shortly and I get back to myself, not to mention some more writing.